My Home, My Mother/Father, My Family
(Totally from my perspective and interpretation of Mercury retrograde in the house of Cancer)
This could reactivate situations pertaining to father/mother, home and family. There may be old issues resurfacing that could need talking out or sorting through. For some this mercury retrograde could bring up resourceful choices or decision making particularly through reunions, reuniting with family or retracing family history. There could very well be some medical areas uncovered pertaining to the genetics of both parents or the heritage line.
Mercury retrograde can have a very productive way of bringing the truth to the surface and allowing one to see, heal and better understand the lesson of such. This is important to remember that when the planet of communication is in reverse so may be your thinking and speech.
Old wounds could resurface, harsh words may be spoken. The home and family may embark on a period of letting go, forgiveness and taking a closer look at that which has created this rift, distance or unsettling between members. Mercury retrograde gifts you with the chance to revisit, acknowledge and learn from that which has transpired. As I said. getting to the bottom of a situation or uncovering the truth in a matter concerning the family or home will be like a pimple on the bottom to some. You know it hurts but you still have to look at it and do something about it as it may not go away. It could just lay dormant until the next time.
This could be the time one of your parents disclose a secret that was never spoken or hinted. Perhaps you feel a rise in an issue that you have kept under wraps concerning your home or family. In either case this month enables you to retrace the steps in which to better understand or comprehend that which may have been missed previously.
We all have family issues. There is not one person that has not or does not. I personally have seen the rift of family throughout my years. How words said in haste, in-laws, outlaws, or distance has created a void that seems to never truly fill. A bit like seeing a picture of the grand canyon or another great canyon or gulf, looks mighty, has history but so much ground and distance to cover before one could really appreciate or understand the universes reasoning of creating such a moment stamped in time forever.
When we are missing someone from our life, we miss their emotional connection. We miss the heritage, history and all that has been shared no matter how short or long. We miss that sense of being as that person is absent and a key player in who we are or have become. Over the years we see the distance over that which once was the connection. (Grand Canyon) we loose a part of that connection that will not ever be replaced but may be reshaped by life experience and how we choose to heal or embrace the experience.
I often say it is the living that hurt the most when we lose them. The ones who have passed over we miss too but we are coming to terms with the understanding that they are in a better place, with us always. It is a rational understanding or logic that gives us a place to grieve.
When we lose a living person from our life. One who through indifference or life path choices we can grieve but part of us also craves the connection or better understanding of why the connection was lost in the first place. Our rational minds will tell us why but our emotions will crave for closure, understanding or the reunion.
I can imagine this is the case for adoptive families, for those who have lost contact with a family member through lost years or other circumstance. To have the knowledge of knowing that they exist but where, how, why, or when questions will need answers.
Personally I can share many instances of living loses. I grew up in a family of uncles, aunts and cousins that lived away. The connection was there and over the years it spread thinly as each matriarch passed over to greet their maker. The family lost contact or fell short on effort. The purpose of unity seemed lost or was most likely not fully there thus allowing the gulf to grow larger til eventually it is like the grand canyon............... a long donkey ride to see or visit that which once steeped in much history and life.
About 4 years ago, my brother, still living, parted ways. We live within 1 minute of each other and often we cross paths without acknowledgement. I see my niece and nephew have grown from a distance and over the years have come to understand this gulf was possibly a lesson in itself that was meant to be.
We as a family are not perfect, no one on this earth plane is. We had a own opinions and independence in life choices. No one really pointed the finger at anyone to blame as we all knew that we are imperfect and that although we may make choices or decisions this does not take away the bond of family and the unconditional reason why you love them.
My dad left the family home when I was 2 years old. Almost 19 years later I reconnect with him and my first words to him face to face were " I do not care about the past, I can about now and Dad I just want to get to know you from now before you have one foot in the grave" I did not need to forgive or dredge up the past. I had no pain or hurt to confront him with as I fully understood through my rational mind why he possibly made the choices he did. It did not mean I did not miss him or wonder where he was or even was resentful at moments I felt he abandoned me. I just knew that he was missing and finding him was more important to my healing than missing him without finding answers or having that contact or connection.
So, 4 years ago my brother decided to cut all contact. This hurt more so because I knew that this was impossible to fix. That time would grow and that I would miss him greatly but I was powerless to change his reasoning. I never once stood against my brother, I never once played the inlaw verses blood game nor did I ever pick away at his life or his choices. I love him for the person he is and in all honestly he was my wind beneath my wings.
I would look at him and just love him to bits. We shared some great times laughing and growing up. Sheez the mischief we got into was worth a novel or two but all that is now missing. I do not have contact with him even though we will pass at the end of the street or cross paths in the shopping centre. I can not walk up to him and say " I understand you reasons, I respect your choices but listen silly old goat (he is a capricorn) come down off the mountain and let's enjoy being a family."
The break in this relationship with my brother was and is varied. Depending on the topic of discussion or the day I am able to say it was because of his hurt or pain with this one or that person. I could say it was his protection, his defensiveness, his choice or his whatever. I could say a lot, but it will not fix this rift that has grown wider over the time. It will not bring back the connection because he has control over this matter and how it has unfolded and how it will continue to unfold in the future.
You may be sitting there saying, well Carolyn just walk down to his door and say bugger it I am here now put the kettle on and lets just get on with life and stop this silliness. Unfortunately, it will not ever be a probable solution as it takes two willing to make an effort.
I can make all the effort I like by myself but without him being open to such it is just a unreachable dream. I have over time let go of the hurt or the being pissed off with his attitude or reason. I actually can see that he has his own reasons and as I have said I respect these. I may not ever fully ever get over the living grief of missing him but I have let go of the resentment and pain of him cutting me out of his life and disconnecting from his nieces and nephews.
I have come to an understanding that this has served a valuable purpose and lesson in my life. I have come to recognise I cant heal the issue from any other angle but my own. I have accepted that although we pass it is not a matter of whether he will make the first step or I. I have respected that this has been a valuable lesson for both and possibly the best course considering the circumstances that led to him making this choice. I have accepted that no matter how many times I may have turned the other cheek, smiled or tried to fix matters it may have been unsuccessfully resolved. I have had to acknowledge and accept the problem or reasoning behind this rift was always going to be there, dormant and in waiting until it could surface again.
This is a classic example of a mercury retrograde and its influence or purpose when it transit Cancer - the home, family and mother/father house. You may be taken back into a time when words cut sharper than a a samurai sword. Where actions created a chain of events that felt like an uncontrolled locomotive. You may be reconnecting physically, emotionally or through memories, but no matter which way you look at this mercury retrograde it will bring your attention to that which needs acknowledging.
This next 4 weeks you could reunite with family, embrace changes home, see a solution to a past argument or find peace in a better understanding of those events or past actions that have affected the house of Cancer. You will see the true connection and significance of parental roles and the influence of that which has shaped your life. This is your time to nurture your own self and take care of you. Allow the universe to help you see that which no longer serves your higher purpose be released and allow the healing to enter.
This is influence is enabling you to slow down and reassess your life, your thoughts, your actions, your words and your future by accessing the past and present moments.
xx Cosmic Hugs xx
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