Seeing Past Regret

Seeing Past Regret

Taking responsibility or healing the gulf is just as important as the experience that created the change and lead to this point of regret. It is one of those feelings that can lead to dismay, mixed feelings and pure emotional and mental exhaustion. The point of realizing you can not change that which has happened but you can be more aware of the future, does not settle the emptiness left by regret.

Ask the person who wishes they so much could change the course of an outcome. Ask the person who wishes with all their might they would have thought differently at the time. Ask the person who is mourning someone, worried over someone or left helpless by a situation that created a gulf of change that lead to much that can no longer be fixed, replaced or put back together.

Regret is real. It is the conscious mind letting you know that you are dealing with unfinished business. You are literally sitting in the middle of could of, should of, why did I, how could I, conversations that are running rampart within the head.

What is regret? it is an unhappiness, disappointment, sorrow, guilt, remorselessness, shame, self condemnation. It is the human mind and emotions going through dejection, mourning and utter helplessness to change a situation that has impacted ones life or that of others.

Regret can build over years only to emerge when one is at the lowest point in life or a situation and it may resurface bring with it years of similar situations or feelings building upon and reinforcing regret. When one feels as if they have failed, pulled up short, lost a chance or are grieving for a person or situation or outcome, they often fill with regret and self blame for feeling powerless in not being able to change the outcome.

Regret can be how you treated someone, how you left a situation unresolved or a turned away from a solution. Regret can emerge when you have time to rethink matters and questions your actions as being impulsive or negative. Perhaps you have had a period of time when you have jumped into or went against your better judgement and the situation ended very badly leading you to questions your logical actions you would be able to undertake now with such hindsight to that which you are now experiencing.

It is the feeling of reassessing such actions and seeing that your choices or lack of have lead to this situation becoming an integral learning block within your self. Yes you do learn from your choices and regrets, we learn that we can not change them but we can take a look at how to better resolve, sort or even forgive and mend that issue that needs healing to enable one to let go of the regret and accept the situation or outcome as a an experience that may take time but one can not change the past only be more aware of the future steps one may choose to take.

1. Look at what you regret, write it down
2. Now write at least one thing you have learned from that situation beside each regret.
3. Write one thing you would do differently in the future connected to that regret.
4. Tick each regret you have listed if you have repeated that same situation again, if so write why ?
5. Look over your regrets, you reasons and solutions to do matters differently if the situation or chance to come again, reassess you motives, motions and reasons behind these regrets in a a way that releases you from self condemnation but allows you to take a responsible look at how you can better change repeating such actions or situations in the future.
6. Where possible let go, forgive, mend or find the avenue that enables you to release this regret in a way that is not going to be harmful to yourself or others.

Common regrets -

1. I wish I would have got a better education - solution never to late to learn
2. I wish I was there when they passed - solution they know you would have if you could have or it was not meant to be. They love you, they understand and would not want you putting yourself through all of this every time you think of them.
3. I wish I would have started this when I was younger - solution well nothing like the present and you will enjoy it more because you are ready for it now.
4. I wish I would not have been so mean to that person - solution is there a way to repair this or perhaps look at if you are in the same situation again to not repeat the same regret.
5. I wish I did not spend, over eat, over indulge, act so irresponsible - solution there is many self help groups, personal plans or people to support you just ask. 
6. I wish I would have said no - solution that no might have not made the difference you feel it would have.
7. I wish I would not have made that decision, I went again my better judgment - solution you are armed with knowledge of what will be a better course in future
8. I wish I would have said I love you more, been more affectionate, hugged, let them know how I felt - solution you are who you are those who love you know this and accept you for the person you were to them. They perhaps do not judge you as harshly as you judge yourself. You can make the change to being more open with your feelings in the future.

I know you are reading this feeling this is so shallow, that regret is a deeper more painful jab that is piercing through your layers of self esteem, confidence and self love and forgiveness. The truth be told, you probably could not have changed the event, situation or circumstance even if you tried. A course was set, a path was to be taken.

The experience that was given through this succession of life experience has been brought through an immense self recognition of understanding that letting go, t

From a higher prospective, I know some may not accept this, so from my belief, I believe that everything happens for a reason. You reading this post is for a reason, be it information you needed to read, be it a chance to let go of something you secretly regret or knowing that you are not alone, that everyone has a regret but does it serve a purpose to hold onto it? I believe no.

I believe the longer you hold onto the regret the longer it takes to let it go and heal. The more immediate you recognise your actions the less inclined you will be to harbor regrets. I am not saying I have not had a regret in my life. I most likely would have had many if i hung onto them. BUT I learned that they served no purpose to be productive in my future life. This does not mean I negated responsibility for my actions or inaction's, it means I looked at my choices and identified with that which I knew I contributed to my situation and then took the steps to remedy, fix,heal, forgive and find a workable solution. 

If you feel you need to seek advice for your past regrets that are controlling your day to day life, be this a counselor, trusted friend or just your higher source. Then, please do so. Don't carry a burden that grows heavy and weary over time. Find a way to heal and let it go. I am not saying doing so will  take you back, or go back in time and then lead to a way to change the course of life but, it will make a large difference to your well being, self love and life in the now and in the future. 

When we live in the moment, we leave no room for regret. We accept the passage of time as building blocks for our soul experience. We accept that we are masters of our choices, we have a choice to hang on or to let go. We accept in our humanness we may make mistakes or create a situation that we can learn from. When we live in the moment we heal, we live, we find peace, forgiveness, compassion and understanding. When we see past regret we find wholeness, love and the real future with a new set of eyes.

xx Cosmic Hugs  xx 

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